PeeCee’s Exotic : Keep That Mute Button Handy

exoticpriyankapitbull

I am a big, BIG fan of Priyanka Chopra. I have been a fan of her ever she emerged from the sea in a tiny blue bikini in that disaster called Andaaz. So, what did I do when she recently came out of the sea again in a thoroughly wet bikini and started singing “Cool me down..
I’m feeling so exotic!” ? Easy. I hit the mute button, and then proceeded to enjoy the rest of the show.

Yes, it is that bad. What makes it even worse is that this is not the first time. I had enjoyed her first single, “In my city” in the exact same manner. When I first learned that beloved PC was considering a career in music, I was thrilled. Like I said, I’ve been a fan for almost a decade now. Her PR people also cleverly built up the hype. I mean, collaboration with Will.I.Am, the banner of Universal Music, the fact that she wrote the lyrics herself: I was led to believe that this girl was really a cultural genius. But then the song was launched, and my disillusionment was rapid.

In both her songs, the problem starts with the absolute basic. The lyrics.  Take this sample from “In my city” for example:

Everybody’s welcome here
Everybody welcome to my city
We got no worries here
I know you gonna like it in my city
You know you got a friend in me
You ain’t gonna wanna leave
C’mon…

Well, for starters, somebody certainly forgot to tell that to the Shivsena. As for the lyrics, you might say that a lot of hit songs nowadays have similar meaningless words. Sure they do. And I’ll be damned if I call them music. Anyways, with the words of Exotic, she seems to have outdone herself. Here’s a sample:

Cool me down
I’m feeling so exotic
Yaa right now
I’m hotter than the tropics
Take me there
Mumbai Cuba baby let’s go
La-love me all the way to Rio

Well, for PC’s sake I hope Mamata Banerjee doesn’t get to hear it anytime soon. She wouldn’t take the Cuba reference too well. As for the rest of the song, it’s equally meaningless and empty. I’m not sure what exactly Pitbull is doing here. Did she really think his presence is going to make this debacle any more endearing? Also, those forced desi  lines being rather clumsily forced into the song doesn’t help things either.

Tumko jo dekha maine

Toh maine ye jaan liya hai

Pardesi babu ne

Iss desi dil ko maan liya hai

Seriously???

As for the tune, it borders on catchy, just like In My City, but those aforementioned cheap Hindi lines are guaranteed to take even that pleasure away from you. As for her singing, just like her previous single this also is filled with so much electronic noise that I’m still not sure if I heard an actual female voice somewhere in there.

And finally, the video. I think I hardly need to say something here, but I would. Call it loyalty. Yes, she is probably the only woman on earth who looks better than JLo in a Jlo dress.

See what I'm talking about?

See what I’m talking about?

And yes, not many women can wear a neon green bra on camera and still manage to look ravishing.

Like I said..

Like I said..

The rest of the wardrobe, I assure you, is equally remarkable and spectacular.  She doesn’t really display any groundbreaking dance moves, but trust me, you won’t mind that a bit. At least I sure as hell didn’t. If only..she had not bothered to sing that trash. I mean it isn’t, strictly speaking, necessary. She could’ve launched this as a silent video and still made a million bucks from it. Yes, if you leave out the actual music out of this music video, it is that good.

So go enjoy the show folks, and keep that mute button handy. Cheers!

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